Thankful for my Heritage

I have taken on the monumental task of scanning old slides and negatives, some older than I am.  I have been looking at them first through a viewer or strong light.  I almost didn't scan this one as I thought, it's just a bunch of old camp chairs.  It was labeled simply "vacation."  But I scanned it anyway.  



When I saw it full view on my computer screen, I looked beyond the obvious and saw what was sitting on the small folding chair...a Bible and a concordance (most likely Strong's!).  I thought again how thankful I am for the heritage we kids received from our parents.  I don't know if Dad was preparing a sermon for the Indians in Bishop, or if Mother was just doing some study...and it doesn't matter.  What matters is that we can see what was important to them, even when they were on vacation.

Be Still and Know…

It’s been over four years now since a major “trouble” hit our family.  It was (is) devastating and the law was involved.  We did what we could to offer our help and support and even paid needed attorney fees.  And we prayed…my how we prayed.

Although our hearts were broken and our spirits troubled, I felt at the very beginning that God had given me a scripture, “Be still and know that I am God” from Ps. 46:10.

And so we did what we could and we waited.  Not so patiently sometimes, and not without a great deal of angst.  In the midst of this trouble, I puzzled many times over the scripture I felt had been dropped into my heart.  Was there something else I could do?  Was there another person I could contact, another letter I could write?   If only I knew what more I could do, it would surely make a difference in the outcome.

The case was in the hands of the county prosecutor and for four long years they threatened yet did nothing to bring the situation to a conclusion…no arrest, no warrants…NOTHING but phone calls about once a year.  Surely I thought this was all going to go away.  “Be still and know that I am God.”  I puzzled over how this issue was going to be resolved.  Was God going to sweep in and deliver the accused of all wrong-doing?  Was He going to soften the heart of the authorities?  Was He going to change the law and just make it all go away?  “Be still and know that I am God.”  That must mean that God is going to do a miracle on behalf of the person who made a bad choice.

In the end that miracle did not happen and, just two weeks ago, the matter has had an outcome that we did not want to see.  It could have been worse, but it is still devastating and our family will live with this for the rest of our lives.  So many lives affected and so many people hurt.

I admit I was hurt and angry.  And yes, I did not understand why God had given me the scripture and then let me down.  Why didn’t God solve this problem in the manner that I would have liked to have seen?  Did He not speak that verse to my heart and is He not still the God of miracles?  Depression set in and questions with no answers chased themselves through my mind on a Mobius circle track.  No answers, just an endless circle.

I had not told my brother of the scripture that I felt had been given to me.  Yet we were emailing back and forth and yesterday he related to me an incident that happened in his own life many years ago.  Here is what he wrote:

“Years ago I was walking down the street. Nothing was going right and everything and everyone seemed to be disintegrating into stupid… I was so frustrated… Then I saw a picture in my head. I will not call it a vision, but it was, to my thinking none-the-less Godly! I was standing on a fault line running from the north pole to the south pole with one foot on either side, trying as best I could to squeeze my legs together to keep the world from splitting apart. The still small voice in the background simply said, “Hard to keep it together isn’t it?” Then there was a pause, as I contemplated the absurdity of the question. Then there are a follow-up – “If I do not do it, you cannot, so stop trying and go home and get some sleep!” I laughed and did as told.

I am still not good at letting things take their own course or letting failure happen, but I am trying to do what I can and then release it to others and to God.”

As I read these words, I had an epiphany of sorts.  Perhaps I had misunderstood God.  Maybe “Be still and know that I am God” meant just that!  Maybe the miracle was that God is in control and I don’t need to be.  Maybe I need to learn to trust Him, even when He doesn’t do things the way I would!!  Perhaps I need to rest in His presence and know that if He is the one who holds the world together then all my striving and manipulations are not really needed.


This is not a “cop-out” to sit back and do nothing.  Nor is it meant to say that God allowed this family tragedy to occur so He could teach me a lesson.  It is about learning to trust in the midst of the trial without thinking that I need to solve every problem.   Ultimately we do what we can and leave the rest to God.  We may not understand, but we can trust.  Certainly if God doesn’t do it (whatever “IT” happens to be) then how could I think that I can?  It is God that holds the world together, not me standing on the fault line trying to keep it from flying apart.  It is God who is in control of situations that we do not understand and cannot change. 

I slept last night better than I have in over four years.  “Be still and know that I am God.”  God is.

Made With Love?

I did something a little different this year.  I handmade all the Christmas gifts for the family (23 in all)– except for the two beautiful walking sticks handcrafted by my Dear Husband, Russ.  Most seemed to appreciate my efforts and I even had three requests for additional items.

 





Russ makes a good model, doesn’t he?!?!




















Then, between Christmas and New Years, I had a houseful of teens.  The two from out of town spent the entire time here and the three local ones spent most days and several nights here as well.  On New Year’s eve, we had all 5 teens for a New Years watch party and sleepover.

In a word, EXHAUSTING!!  Added to that, I was trying to fulfill a request by one of the girls to make her a dress – customized to her specifications.  Normally not a big deal but with all the things I had just made and all the company and busyness of Christmas, I was tired.  Still I worked on the dress, but didn’t quite get it finished in time for her to take it home with her when she left.

 After all the kids had left and most of the mess was cleaned up, I began to work on the dress.  I wasn’t happy.  The granddaughter had said she would help and she didn’t.  She had told me of a life style decision she is making and wanted me to support that.  When I said I would accept her but could not approve of her choices, she became upset and all the cousins rallied to her side.   For the first time ever they were rude and disrespectful to us and our home, and even left behind some disrespectful posters they had made while they were here.

And so as I worked on this dress, I grumbled and complained.  “She doesn’t deserve this dress,” I thought.  “She needs to show more respect and make better choices.”  “I’m tired and don’t feel like working on this dress.”

Have you ever heard that ‘still, small voice?’  I did and it was not very small!!  Like a gentle knock on the noggin, I heard God say to me, “You can sew that dress and make each stitch a knot of your hurt and resentment or you can use the sewing time to pray for this child and fill every stitch with love.”

WHOA!  How many times have I asked God for something that I didn’t deserve.  God has never broken a promise made to me and He has continued to love me even when I have wandered away from His best plan for my life.  I made a promise to this granddaughter to make her a dress.  It was up to me to stitch it with either resentment or love…my choice.  I am almost finished with it now, and as I sew, I pray for this child.  When I give her the dress I hope that she will feel my love.  When she wears that dress, I pray she will be enveloped not only in my love, but in some way, will feel God’s love as well.  She was dedicated to God as an infant and I trust that someway, someday her heart will turn back towards Him.  In the meantime, I need to watch my attitude and always finish each stitch with love.



( It’s a costume based on a Japanese  (Anime) cartoon character.  I don’t understand – but this is what she wanted!!)

Just As I Am

I woke up this morning with the words to that old song playing through my head.  Like so many of the hymns that I remember as a girl, this one is no longer heard that often.  But as I thought about the words, I found myself humbled by the simplicity,  yet profound meaning, found in those words.

“Just as I am…”  I don’t have to get dressed up or cleaned up to come to Jesus.  There is nothing I can do to make myself presentable or worthy of His love, and yet that love is all encompassing.  He is always there waiting for me…just as I am.

“without one plea…”  When you are arrested for breaking the law and you go to court, you are required to enter a plea.  Which of us, when standing before God in our own flesh, could enter a plea of “Not Guilty?”  Yet, we can come boldly to his throne, knowing that we are guilty but not having to enter a plea because…

“…but that thy blood was shed for me…”   When that criminal stands before the judge and enters a plea of “guilty” he can expect to receive a sentence commensurate with his crime.  He will serve that sentence, and his offense will be on his record.  But because of the shed blood of Jesus Christ I can stand guiltless before Him and there is no record of my crimes.  He has already paid my debt.

“…and as thou bidst me come to thee, O Lamb of God I come, I come.”  What a wonderful promise.  He stands with arms held wide, bidding, calling us to come to Him.  Not because of anything we can do on our own but because we are clean and free through Jesus.  We can rest our weary heads on his welcoming shoulder and receive comfort in our time of need.  How wonderful that we can say with confidence…”I come, I come.”



I love the last two lines of this song “…because thy promise, I believe, O lamb of God I come, I come.”

As The Twig is Bent…

I have a tree in my yard that I dearly love.  I received this tree as a seedling in a table top Christmas arrangement, probably a dozen years ago now. 

When Christmas was over, and the rest of the arrangement was ready for the rubbish heap, I saved that little pine seedling and planted it in my backyard.  I never expected it to grow, but grow it did! 


I thought when I planted it that it was planted straight and far enough away from the fence.  I was wrong on both counts!  It was such a tiny twig that I only staked it with a tiny stake, and I never bothered to drive that stake very far into the ground, nor did I ever check to see that the stake had been outgrown by the tree. 

The tree grew, its branches going clear to the ground and disguising how very crooked the little tree was growing.  It was healthy and nice to look at and that’s all that mattered.  Then, it got so big and bushy that it was pushing against the fence, threatening the stability of that fence.  Something had to be done.

It was only after trimming away all the lower branches that we could see how crooked that tree had grown. 

It was just this past summer that the county installed new sidewalks on our street and also planted new trees.  Each tree is held taut and straight by two stakes.  I watched as they planted the trees and installed those stakes…they really pounded them deep into the ground.  Since there are two stakes working together, the tree is held upright and will grow straight.



I was reminded of the verse from Proverbs, which tell us:
Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
 
Sometimes we fail to realize how important it is to give a child the stability of boundaries…to give them something strong to hold onto in the storms…and to provide parameters within which they can measure their decisions and choices.   We are told that children need to grow and experience life and make their own decisions.  All true BUT parents have, in many cases abrogated their responsibility to train that child how to make those important life decisions. 
 
We have, in many cases, become so afraid of being seen as a bigot or as politically incorrect that we fail to teach our children that there is a right and a wrong.  No, it is not for us to judge others but we do have a responsibility to train our children and to speak up for right and wrong if we are asked.  That is not judgment, that is common sense. 
 
How will a child know right from wrong unless he is told?  He will certainly not be told by his teachers, the popular press, or (God help us) the movies and TV. 
 
I have heard Christians say we should not judge and I agree with that.  Only God will judge.  They often quote the story about the woman at the well and state that even Jesus did not judge her but said, “Neither do I condemn you.”  What they often leave off is the rest of that quote which is, “go and sin no more.”  Jesus was acknowledging that her behavior was sinful and that the woman at the well was to stop those behaviors.  He was not afraid to call a sin a sin, yet he was gracious and loving in his rebuke. 
 
Like the hoards of people in the story of the Emperor's New Clothes, we have become so conditioned to going along with the popular ideas that we have become afraid to speak out and say, the emperor is naked.  We might be accused of being bigots or judgmental, or worse, (that new word) HATERS! 
 
Just because something is accepted, does not make it right.  Just because we CAN do something, does not mean that we should.  It is not our responsibility to call people out and judge them to be sinners.  It is not our job to accuse or condemn anyone.  God loves us all and so we must love each one at the point they are in their life journey. 
 
It is however, every parent’s responsibility to train their child and to teach them that there is a right and wrong and how to tell the difference.  I also feel it is our responsibility to tell the truth IN LOVE if we are asked about sin.  There is a fine line there and I am not sure I know how to walk it, but I do know that I will not tell my grandchildren or children that black is white and sin is fine as long as it is legal.  God sets rules not to stifle us but to protect us from destructive behaviors.
 
Recent events in the media show that we need to be careful and think before we speak, and frame our comments in the context of God’s love and redemption.  But it also points out how we can be vilified if we stand  for righteousness.  We, as Christians, have remained silent when perhaps we should have spoken out and now that freedom to speak out is being eroded and shouted down by those who are politically correct.  To disagree is to be a hater.
 
What’s the answer?  I honestly don’t know, but this I do know.  If we do not teach our children from a young age, if we do not train them up in the way they should go, if we are afraid to stand for righteousness, then we are doomed to live in an upside down world where sin is embraced and glorified and righteousness is vilified.  Is that really what we want?
 
P.S. As crooked as that little backyard tree is, I still love it dearly.  I just wish I had trained it better when it was still a twig.

A Word in Due Time

Those of you who know me, know how much I adore my grandchildren.  As they enter and progress through their teenage years, my heart aches for them.  I know the trials they will go through and the decisions they will have to make.  No one can make decisions for a teenager, but they don't always have the experience and wisdom to make life-changing decisions on their own.  

Two of my granddaughters are in Portland so I mostly see them only on school holidays.  When they were down for spring break, my heart was heavy, knowing some of the things they were each facing.  I didn't know what to do but as we were taking them home, it dawned on me.  I asked them both if they would take one month and go through a chapter of Proverbs each day with me.  

Each day of April, I posted a chapter of Proverbs to their FB messages, along with a little blurb about what that chapter meant to me.  About halfway through the month, I was getting discouraged because there had been little response on the part of the girls.  My dear husband reminded me that God asked me to be faithful to plant the see, that the growth and harvest of that seed was not up to me but up to God.

Towards the end of the month one of the girls started responding every day and we had some good conversations.  Still, I wondered, did it mean anything?  Was I just being silly or had I really heard from God?

Today I received an email from a friend I went to grammar school with.  I had not heard from this friend for YEARS.  Here is the text of her email:  (please forgive the errors, I didn't want to take liberties with her words.  She was probably typing on a mobile device - you all know how hard that is!)

"I felt to tell you that when you where in grammar school and had your little bible study's. That helped people later in life remember the Lord little bit. words you spoke back then as a child even if they didn't remember much of it.  You sewed a seed in them small hearts. I remember myself listening only once.  I know that was others out there more frequently. I don't know anything about your life but I felt led to tell you you did a good thing as a child.

I have been back in church now sense Aug 2011. God sent me to a wonderful church in Bullhead City, AZ. Pastor Barb likes to say where at the ends of the earth. I have to say most of us really do like the desert here in Arizona away from everything.

So grandma teach your grand kids all about Jesus."

Isn't God good?  He is faithful to meet us at the point of our need and to send a Word when we need it.

Galatians 6:9

American Standard Version (ASV)

⁹ And let us not be weary in well-doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

 

Cracked Pot

I posted this story to my travel blog a couple of years ago but I think it bears repeating here.  I almost feel foolish posting this as I am sure most everybody is familiar with the story.  However, I first heard it only 5 years ago, and it touched me deeply.  There may be someone out there in cyberspace who needs to read this story.
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I have tried to find the origin of this story but, in doing the research, found there are many permutations and differing theories of the origins of this tale. So just let it be said, the story is not original with me and you may have heard it a slightly different way at some time.

The Story of the Cracked Pot:

Long long ago, a very rich man owned a beautiful mansion. He was a kind master and gentle with his servants. His water bearer would go every day to bring water from the spring to the mansion. The servant would hook two large pots to the ends of a pole, place the pole on his shoulders and make the trek to the spring.

The servant would fill the pots up to the brim with water but every day he only had one and one half pots of water by the time he got back to the master’s mansion. It seems one of the pots was cracked, and along the way home, would loose a portion of its water.

One day, as the servant prepared for his trek to the spring, the pot asked the servant,
“Why do you keep filling me with water when you know I will leak? The master has many vessels and you could easily get a new pot.”

The servant did not answer the pot. He just put the vessels on his pole and began his trip to get the water. On the way back to the mansion, he said to the pot,

“Have you ever noticed all the beautiful wild flowers along this path?”

“Why yes,” said the pot, “But what has that to do with me?”

“Have you noticed that the flowers grow on only one side of the path?” asked the servant.

“No, I never paid much attention to that,” replied the pot.

“These beautiful flowers are picked to adorn the master’s table,” explained the servant. “Without them the mansion would be dreary. The flowers bring beauty and joy to all who enter the mansion.”

“That’s wonderful, I never knew that.”

The servant began to explain to the cracked pot.

“These flowers grow only on one side of the path because, as we walk along this path, the water that leaks from your imperfection waters the ground. The seeds sprout up and become beautiful flowers. It is from your imperfection that beauty grows.”

The pot was silent as he thought about what the servant had told him. He began to see himself in a whole new light as he realized that what he saw as imperfection was actually a benefit to the master. From that day on the pot saw himself in a whole new light and no longer worried over his imperfections. In fact, he was quite comfortable with them and began to focus on the beauty that lined his path rather than the imperfections in his vessel.

Are you a Cracked Pot? Perhaps the imperfections that you perceive in yourself are there for a purpose and are actually bringing beauty to those around you.

A couple of years ago, I was searching for a cracked pot with

which to illustrate this story. We stopped at a wonderful little pottery shop near Walker, CA on Hwy 395. This shop had many examples of native American pottery, most made by the Navajo people. While I did not find a pot with a crack in it, I did find one that had a bad chip. He sold it to me for half price and I keep it on display in my hutch to remind myself to not take my imperfections too seriously.

Always remember that God uses imperfect people.  You don't have to look very far in the Bible to find examples of this.  Remember too that if we are focusing on OUR imperfections then we are looking inward when we should be looking upward to the perfection of our Master.  We are all imperfect and regardless of one's flaw, God can and will use each one of us if we focus on Him and not on our imperfections.

2 Corinthians 12:9

New International Version (NIV)

⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  (courtesy http://www.biblegateway.com)