When Christmas was over, and the rest of the arrangement was ready for the rubbish heap, I saved that little pine seedling and planted it in my backyard. I never expected it to grow, but grow it did!
I thought when I planted it that it was planted straight and far enough away from the fence. I was wrong on both counts! It was such a tiny twig that I only staked it with a tiny stake, and I never bothered to drive that stake very far into the ground, nor did I ever check to see that the stake had been outgrown by the tree.
The tree grew, its branches going clear to the ground and disguising how very crooked the little tree was growing. It was healthy and nice to look at and that’s all that mattered. Then, it got so big and bushy that it was pushing against the fence, threatening the stability of that fence. Something had to be done.
It was only after trimming away all the lower branches that we could see how crooked that tree had grown.
It was just this past summer that the county installed new sidewalks on our street and also planted new trees. Each tree is held taut and straight by two stakes. I watched as they planted the trees and installed those stakes…they really pounded them deep into the ground. Since there are two stakes working together, the tree is held upright and will grow straight.
I was reminded of the verse from Proverbs, which tell us:
Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Sometimes we fail to realize how important it is to give a child the stability of boundaries…to give them something strong to hold onto in the storms…and to provide parameters within which they can measure their decisions and choices. We are told that children need to grow and experience life and make their own decisions. All true BUT parents have, in many cases abrogated their responsibility to train that child how to make those important life decisions.
We have, in many cases, become so afraid of being seen as a bigot or as politically incorrect that we fail to teach our children that there is a right and a wrong. No, it is not for us to judge others but we do have a responsibility to train our children and to speak up for right and wrong if we are asked. That is not judgment, that is common sense.
How will a child know right from wrong unless he is told? He will certainly not be told by his teachers, the popular press, or (God help us) the movies and TV.
I have heard Christians say we should not judge and I agree with that. Only God will judge. They often quote the story about the woman at the well and state that even Jesus did not judge her but said, “Neither do I condemn you.” What they often leave off is the rest of that quote which is, “go and sin no more.” Jesus was acknowledging that her behavior was sinful and that the woman at the well was to stop those behaviors. He was not afraid to call a sin a sin, yet he was gracious and loving in his rebuke.
Like the hoards of people in the story of the Emperor's New Clothes, we have become so conditioned to going along with the popular ideas that we have become afraid to speak out and say, the emperor is naked. We might be accused of being bigots or judgmental, or worse, (that new word) HATERS!
Just because something is accepted, does not make it right. Just because we CAN do something, does not mean that we should. It is not our responsibility to call people out and judge them to be sinners. It is not our job to accuse or condemn anyone. God loves us all and so we must love each one at the point they are in their life journey.
It is however, every parent’s responsibility to train their child and to teach them that there is a right and wrong and how to tell the difference. I also feel it is our responsibility to tell the truth IN LOVE if we are asked about sin. There is a fine line there and I am not sure I know how to walk it, but I do know that I will not tell my grandchildren or children that black is white and sin is fine as long as it is legal. God sets rules not to stifle us but to protect us from destructive behaviors.
Recent events in the media show that we need to be careful and think before we speak, and frame our comments in the context of God’s love and redemption. But it also points out how we can be vilified if we stand for righteousness. We, as Christians, have remained silent when perhaps we should have spoken out and now that freedom to speak out is being eroded and shouted down by those who are politically correct. To disagree is to be a hater.
What’s the answer? I honestly don’t know, but this I do know. If we do not teach our children from a young age, if we do not train them up in the way they should go, if we are afraid to stand for righteousness, then we are doomed to live in an upside down world where sin is embraced and glorified and righteousness is vilified. Is that really what we want?
P.S. As crooked as that little backyard tree is, I still love it dearly. I just wish I had trained it better when it was still a twig.
